Tuesday, July 8, 2008

i'm still dealing with my leg saga from april. dr. sofreakinghot tells me that i have reflux in my leg and it's not something mylanta will cure. he's got to send a laser up into my vein and zap it out of existence. he says this will take care of my cankles. but i have to play the insurance game and wait a few months before i can have it done. so in the meantime, i went to my regular doctor and asked for something to take the swelling down while i wait for the surgery.....in october. she agreed and i took my first dosage yesterday morning at 7:30am.

8:00am
oh dear god i hope there's a parking space close today because my bladder is about to explode
8:30am
i am sure that this is the longest pee in voiding history
8:50am
no, this surely must be the longest pee ever
9:20am
okay, maybe i better start restricting fluids so i can actually get some work done
10:04 am
they say that our bodies are made of 98 percent water, i'm sure i have peed out 97 percent
11:00am
begging to be catheterized
11:34am
cursing the fact that my workplace doesn't use the lotioned toilet paper
2:00pm
basically a prune at this point
2:45pm
why did i think wearing the pants with a four button waistband and a belt was a good idea today?
3:05pm
maybe depends aren't such a bad idea afterall
4:15pm
praying fervently to the urine gods for release from this hell
6:25pm
don't have any brains left because i'm sure i've peed them out

4 comments:

TracyMama said...

Oh, D! I'm so sorry! How miserable. I can offer a very disordered silver lining: After such a pee-a-thon, I'd probably go weigh myself! You probably feel light as a feather, no? Hee. I did not know your leg was still giving you so much grief. That's a perfect excuse to mix up a Tequila Dawn cocktail in the evening. (Get it? See what I did there? Instead of Tequila Sunrise---Tequila DAWN!!) Also, as H and I discovered over the weekend, a little Sprite Zero+Sangria=Gooood. Hey, if you're only renting your fluids for 20 minutes, you might as well enjoy the lease, right?

dawn said...

tequila dawn...you so funny you make me laugh long time! i will add that one to the repertoire! and sprite and sangria....hollah!... you could add a splash of lime and midori too. ultra yums.

Craig Elliott Hanna said...

Thanks for sharing......I feel closer to you now?

dawn said...

craig e, just think about it this way....urine a vantage point now that you know my inner workings. :)