Thursday, October 15, 2009



i am heading on a plane to fly back to the place where i started.
a place that i haven't been to in a very long time.

even though i grew up in the south,
and call it my home,
i was born in rhode island.
and when i think of my very early years,
i think of my childhood that was rooted in
things like
the huge marigolds that grew taller than i was
the little brook that ran along the edge of our backyard
disappearing for hours to wander the woods
ballet classes that lasted all day on saturdays
catholic mass that was spoken in latin
and the beautiful colors of fall,
the fall,
the fall.

the address of the street that i lived on was 36 pleasant street.
it was there that my parents fought.
they fought bitterly
tearing one another to shreds
tearing me to shreds
on 36 pleasant street.

and so i am going back to this seemingly idyllic,
seemingly perfect
little childhood place....
this 36 pleasant street
this 36 un-pleasant street.
to wrestle with schizophrenic
memories.
and say goodbye.

10 comments:

keli [at] kidnapped by suburbia said...

what a heart-wrenching post, dawn. i hope you are able to visit your ghosts and then lose them for good.

xoxo
hugs

i will be here to give you big hugs when you get back.

Leenie said...

Your photo and words go deep. A visit to you blog is always so thought provoking. Best wishes on your sojurn.

Char said...

safe travels and putting to rest old ghosts. to honor both the good and the bad because without either, you would not be who you are today.

beautiful poem too. love the shot.

i hope you replace some bad with some wonderful.

Heidi said...

Oh, Dawn. Your words are poetic and heartbreaking. I wish you well on your journey - both physical and emotional. Much, much love to you.

Sandra Lundy said...

oh, dawn...♥

just sending you some love, friend. lots of love.

Linda Sue said...

Some say that you can never go back, that everything moved along, changed, without you...It will be an interesting trip for you, no doubt. And the colours will shout at your eyes!

Tracy said...

Oh, sweet D. I'm so sorry this had to happen to you. It sucks being a kid sometimes and although I'm sending you hugs now, I wish I could go back in time and hug the scared little girl that you used to be on Pleasant Street. But, that little girl is part of YOU, and you, my dear, are exquisite.
xxxooo

Cait said...

A beautiful time of year to be in there back East..on the other hand. Stay strong. I know you can do it. You've helped so many others. Stay strong!

Sue said...

you couldn't have expressed yourself any better...I hope you find what you are looking for.....or a closure to the past.

kendalee said...

I applaud your courage and I hope you find peace of mind... goodbyes can be so healing.