the dawn of an older age

i am heading on a plane to fly back to the place where i started.
a place that i haven't been to in a very long time.

even though i grew up in the south,
and call it my home,
i was born in rhode island.
and when i think of my very early years,
i think of my childhood that was rooted in
things like
the huge marigolds that grew taller than i was
the little brook that ran along the edge of our backyard
disappearing for hours to wander the woods
ballet classes that lasted all day on saturdays
catholic mass that was spoken in latin
and the beautiful colors of fall,
the fall,
the fall.

the address of the street that i lived on was 36 pleasant street.
it was there that my parents fought.
they fought bitterly
tearing one another to shreds
tearing me to shreds
on 36 pleasant street.

and so i am going back to this seemingly idyllic,
seemingly perfect
little childhood place....
this 36 pleasant street
this 36 un-pleasant street.
to wrestle with schizophrenic
memories.
and say goodbye.